Coffee is one of the most popular drinks in the world, but there are so many ways to drink it! There are about as many types of coffee drinkers in the world as there are people, but we’ve managed to condense all those super-long coffee orders into seven different categories...read on and see if any of them belong to you!
The Instant Coffee Drinker
I would lovingly and concernedly label this group as the what are you doing with your life? segment of the coffee-drinking population. Sure, instant coffee is quick and gets you awake,
These folks drink coffee because they need to be awake, and fast. Taste is a secondary concern to being awake enough to drive to work, which - you are more metal than me, my friend.
The One and Done
Similar to the Instant Coffee Drinker, the One and Done coffee drinker drinks with a purpose. Coffee is just for keeping awake through your morning meeting. It’s a check off on your to-do list, just like remembering where you put your keys. You don’t really pay attention to the taste of your coffee cause you’ve got things to do.
You might not even like the taste of coffee, you just need to be awake.
The only difference between this one and the last is the quality of coffee; you at least love yourself enough to use real coffee grinds and not freeze-dried instant, but only just. You’re not quite as metal as those coffee drinkers who were sorted into House Instant, but you make up for it by your coffee actually being...coffee.
The Addict is the exact opposite of the One and Done. Coffee is your saving grace. You not only love the taste of it, but sometimes it’s your one and only break for a good thing in the middle of a stressful day. So you take one again...and again...and again.
Okay, so maybe you have a little one-pot-a-day problem. Or a two-pot-a-day problem. But the point is, you and coffee should probably update your Facebook status to true love.
The Sugar Fiend
Some people tease you for not even liking coffee, but that’s not true! You love coffee - you just love sweet coffee. Frappes, sweet syrups, hot coffee with cream and lots of sugar - drinks with any of these things are your jam.
People might call you “basic” in the fall when your pumpkin lattes are all over instagram, but we all know you’ve just got style.
People may blink when you ask for some butter in your coffee, but you know what you’re about. You’re living that bulletproof life, using healthy oils for brain food and keeping your sugar intake low.
Maybe you’re living a low-carb lifestyle, or maybe you’re just pleased with the energy punch that a bulletproof coffee packs, you’re all about healthy oils in your coffee. Small amounts of butter, MCT or coconut oil, and limited heavy cream all go in your coffee to make sure your brain is bulletproof.
The Craft Latte Snob
Some people might call you a snob, but really it’s a badge of honor! You’re all about that freshly-pulled espresso, perfectly steamed milk with foam on top, and terms like single-origin and small batch mean everything to you when it comes to coffee.
You’re right at home in a craft coffee shop, or you might even have an espresso machine in your own home to make sure your lattes are just right. You even love a bit of latte art from time to time - who wouldn’t?
The Coffee Bean Snob
The older cousin of the Craft Latte Snob, the Coffee Bean Snob loves all coffee - as long as the beans are just right! Single-origin, small batch beans are important, and you care about whether or not your beans are acidic or smooth. You’re the person who can tell when a coffee has hints of vanilla or a touch of citrus, and you know which ones you prefer.
Like the Craft Latte Snob, you aren’t really a snob - you just have a refined palate!
Which one of these seven kinds of coffee drinkers are you? Are you more than one? Did we leave anything out?
Let us know in the comments below!